What if Batman crashes into The Avengers?

Scenario 1:-

Steeve Rogers : Big Man in a suit of Armour, take that off and what are you?

Bruce Wayne: A genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, Inquisitor, an acrobat, expert Martial artist and a lot more.

Steeve: Sorry but, that question was for Tony!

Scenario 1:-

The following would happen:

Iron Man: Look who fell out of the sky.

Thor: At least he looks better than you, Stark.

Batman: I am Batman.

Captain America: Pleased to meet you, soldier. You wanna help us take down Ultron.

Black Widow: Like that would help.

Hawkeye: I kinda like him, he looks like a bat.

Batman takes out his EMP gun and disables Ultron.

*Suddenly everybody is shocked*

Giant-Man: An EMP gun? Just an EMP gun? 

Avengers: Well, that was unexpected.

Scenario 3:-

Batman flying in bat mobile and gets attacked by Dr.Doom, BAAM.

Captain America: Civillian attacked. Hawk eye, is he safe?

Hawk eye: Yes captain, he got out before hitting, this guy doesn't look like a civillian, though.

Black Widow: Where did he go ?

Iron man finds him with his thermal imaging,  flies to him at mach3 zoooo zoooo zoooooooo... 

Iron man: hey you, fancy dress party is over, get out of here before you get hurt.

Batman: (IGNORING), take me to your leader.

Iron man: looks like you are actually hit, in the head. Captain, he need a doc.

Batman: pressing some button on his utility belt.  

Suddenly iron suit shuts down. 

Batman: Who is your leader. 

Iron man with wet pants: That guy in blue pajamas.

Batman to captain america: I have to save the galaxy from some aliens, I want you to warm up.

Meanwhile Hulk: Raaaawrrrr (screaming)

Captain america: It really seems you are hit in head, tony was not kidding (whispering to himself). Go to the nearest hospital I would train you later soldier. 

Batman: Can I take this guy's green cap? Its lantern's birthday on monday.

Caotain America: We have been fighting him for two hours.
Captain america laughs from within.

Batman sees, because he is Batman, Batman gets fucked up. Batman takes some gadget out from his utility belt, throwing it on Doom. Doom dodges but that was the plan. Hits a pole behind Doom and falls on Doom. Takes some another gadget out and captures doom in a force field.

Avengers: poker face

Batman: I am not used to such long warm ups.

Avengers looking at batman.

Batman standing gazing down.

Avengers looking at Doom, again poker face.
Meanwhile Batman was whistling.

Avengers looking at batman again, No batman there, already gone. 
(He was not wistling actualy, he was getting out quick for another poker face.)

Avengers: poker face

Avengers looking at doom: no Green cape.(Poker face).

Justice league to Batman in space shuttle: Why are you late, we were supposed to meet at 10:00 a.m and it is 10.01 a.m

Batman: poker face